Linkedin Pretentiousness

Often I’d scroll through social media, particularly Linkedin, and my eyes would gaze on posts that have this same exact tone:

“I’m proud to announce that I will be joining the [redacted] team at [company]!! I’ve worked so hard to get here, without anyone helping me get my foot in the door, cold hard application! I’d like to thank my recruiter, [redacted]. Hoping to make a big difference in the field of [redacted]!”

Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s a commendable virtue to be able to humble yourself and accredit your success to those who helped you achieve it, but I can’t help but feel a pretentious tone attributed to these types of posts. Are you really thankful for the people who’ve helped you along the way? Or just wanted to sprinkle a bit of humble sauce to make it seem like you really appreciate the people who’ve helped you get to where you are.

Come on, this isn’t fooling anyone. Drop this bullshit corporate language and say what you really want to say. I’m going to direct this to people who do this to seem more employable to companies. First off, I don’t respect you. This kind of thinking is what gives rise to the whole “9-5 cubicle” stereotype. You’re acting how they WANT you to. You’re giving them control by conforming to their standards. Mindlessly droning away, giving into this hivemind.

Is the money really worth it in the long run? The status? Prestige? When you’re on your deathbed, will you be proud that you gave up your individuality to be rich? I’d rather be panhandling nobody than be a wealthy corporate wagie. Stick to your damn principles, or having a mind of your own will soon be illegal. And if you don’t have any, read. Read some more, and when you’re done, read again. Eventually, you’ll form your basis. And from there, that’s when you’ll begin to reap the true benefits, not $250 a year on optometry credit or some shit.

It was just pride month; notice that many companies changed their logos to include the pride flag? And what happens on July 1st? Oh, onto the next thing. Either you celebrate it all the time, or you don’t. It’s all a PR stunt; they don’t actually care. The goal of a business is to make money. No more, no less. If the public perception of the company goes up, so does the stock, and so do their pockets. If it didn’t benefit them, they wouldn’t waste their resources virtue signaling. Get it out of your head. Companies don’t care.

Use Linkedin as a free (as in economical) resume hosting service, not a place where you feed this cult. Better yet, host your resume on your own website, it’s free (as in freedom).

-ekd